Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Motherhood Guilt

Motherhood guilt has already started to settle in for me. I feel like I haven’t been documenting my pregnancy enough. I have a personal journal that I have (inconsistently) been writing notes and experiences in, but I feel like it’s not enough. There’s no week-by-week record of how my body is changing or how I am feeling. A part of me really wants to have that, but another part of me realizes that that is just not who I am (remember the sunrise example).

I also have this weird hesitation about being classified as a “mommy blogger”. I think being a mom automatically places me in this amazing group of women who have lead the way before me. However, I also realize that there are tons of women who are not yet in that season of life, or desperately want to be but haven’t had the opportunity. I have been reluctant to post motherhood-focused topics because I don’t want to isolate those without children.

I hear that this penchant for guilt only continues as your children grow. One unfortunate quote that someone said to me was, “A mother is only as happy as her unhappiest child”. What a bummer that is! However, I completely understand where that comes from. My child is not even in this world yet and I already want what is best for him; I can only imagine what it will be once he is actually here, making life-altering decisions.

How do you deal with guilt (of any kind)? What do you think about “mommy bloggers”?


  1. I don't deal with guilt too much because I try not to compare myself to others.If I do feel guilt it's because I have put too much of an expectation on myself.
    As far a mommy bloggers go I think sometimes they lose their identity and it becomes all about their children and trying to be the perfect mom. I was a woman with a life before I had children and I continue to do so now that I have 3 children. I think there needs to be a balance.

  2. Thank you for your comment. This is a direct quote that I pulled from the original draft for this post, "I don't want to be defined by my children. I want to be defined by my beliefs, my actions, and what I love."

    As the for the guilt, when I really examine where it is coming from, I can see that it stems from comparison. I mean, my mother doesn't have week-by-week photos detailing her growing baby bump and I love her all the same. Seeing other mom bloggers doing it made me feel like I needed to, yet I don't want to be defined in that way. Oh, the internal conflict!

    I appreciate that you've taken the time to stop by, read, and comment on my post. It is encouraging to hear from other mothers who haven't stopped being who they are because they have children.


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